#BLOGPHOBIA 3: Facing My Coding Fears
Written by Delta Moxie, ARWB Blogger of the Month October 2013

In the last #BLOGPHOBIA posts we’ve uncovered different phobias as well as identified when phobias or fears are an issue.

By writing these #BLOGPHOBIA posts, one untold fear keeps showing up for me. It’s my fear of learning to code. Like many fears in my life, it shows up as something I resist. The more I resist something, it negatively shows up in my brain as, “I don’t know nothin’ bout coding and I don’t want to know nothin’ ‘bout coding.” {If seeing that in writing grates on your every last nerve, believe me it sounds worse in my head.}

Know what happens next? Coding shows up everywhere. I turn on the TV….there’s a story on Google and all of their world-changing coders working in their fantasy office jobs. I listen to NPR and someone is talking about coding. Click on my favorite site, Arkansas Women Bloggers, and there’s Tech Adventure Club’s Sarah Daigle Scott’spost on…you guessed it…learning to code. I had to read her post. I had to watch the video. Wow. Maybe my beliefs have been unfounded because I was inspired.

I am a person who loves a challenge and finds learning new things exciting.

Then, as if she were in my head and was personally reaching out to me on cue,Jeanetta Darley of The Splendid Things tweeted this:

I took this as a sign from the universe and registered for Code Academy. I even completed the first few exercises. Intrigued, my seven-year-old daughter helped me. We then registered her on Kahn Academy and she jumped into some programming lessons. She was immersed.

Instead of fearing and resisting coding, a seemingly simple shift in my thought process provided the place where I’m allowing it into my life. Give me a spoon and I’ll feed myself some code alphabet soup.

Where will learning to code take me? I don’t know…but I’m open to the possibilities. I mean, maybe one day I’ll be able to improve my blog and even make my header bigger all by myself. It’s one baby step, or one spoonful, at a time.

Thanks to this community of women who generously share their knowledge.

What’s next? I’m considering completing a CodeAcademy course a day for Jacqueline Wolven’s Do Good Work 30 Day Challenge. This will be my third month with her Do Good Work 30 Day Challenge Facebook Group and a coding course a day would fit for me. You can read about the challenge here.

If I gave you a spoon, what would you consider attempting? Share your process of overcoming resistance, fears or phobias. When you resist a fear or phobia does it show up everywhere, like it does for me?

Thanks for reading #BLOGPHOBIA 3. You can find Delta Moxie on Facebook here, follow on twitter @deltamoxie, Google+, and tumblr.

Get that Needle Away from Me!
Written by Yavonda Chase of LittleRockMamas

 
I’ve never been a fan of needles.

In fact, they really freaked me out.

Oh, I could stand to get blood drawn at the doctor’s office — if I didn’t watch. I got all of my essential vaccinations as a child and the boosters as an adult. But you’d better believe I avoided the ones I considered optional — like the flu shot. I’ve actually said, “I’d rather get the flu than the flu shot.”

Still not convinced of my phobia?

I must admit that I have been known to rejoice in the fact that my semester in London raised my risk of developing mad-cow disease and therefore means I can’t give blood. No guilt for me — the Red Cross doesn’t WANT my blood!

I think my last example officially pushed my needle aversion into unhealthy territory.

So if you had told me two years ago that I would be giving myself a shot every day, I would have told you that you were nuts. But that is exactly what I do.

In July 2011, I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. At the time, there was one treatment in a pill form, but it was brand new and my neurologist wasn’t yet sold on it. So my options were shots, shots or shots. There was the daily shot option, which had the least number of physical side-effects but required a daily shot! Then there were ones that were every other day and had flu-like side effects. The final option was one shot a week, but it had to be given intramuscularly and had wicked flu-like side effects.

I admit I freaked out over my options. We won’t even discuss how much I freaked out over the diagnosis — that is a whole different blog post. Ultimately, I gritted my teeth, put on my big girl panties and chose the daily shot option in the hopes that my daughter wouldn’t see her mommy being sick all of time.

Guess what? It hasn’t been that bad. I’ll admit that there are days I can’t stand the thought of giving myself a shot and I don’t. (Don’t tell my neurologist!) But those days are pretty rare.

Most days, I really don’t think about the shot. At first I always used an auto injector, which hid the needle from sight. But now, I have found that there are certain areas that are easier to inject manually. So I do. It is just life.

I didn’t bat an eye when I got my flu shot last week. And I recently bid on and won a couple of trips to an acupuncturist. The woman taking my money told me I was brave to try acupuncture. My reply, “After jabbing myself daily, I don’t figure this will be that different.”

So I guess I’ve conquered my phobia. I guess that is one good thing MS has done for me — but out of sheer stubbornness, I refuse to give it the credit.

Yavonda Chase blogs as Lucky Mama on Little Rock Mamas. She and her husband have one beautiful daughter, two dogs and one cat in a house that will never be organized! Yavonda loves to spend much of her time reading, which makes her career as a newspaper editor a pretty good fit.

This Mommy Is Scared
Written by Karen Weido of Ting’s Mom Blog

I was a mere two years old with little Adam Walsh went missing. It was a time before Facebook or Twitter. There were no missing children alerts on our phones. But Adam’s dad made it his life mission to educate the nation on missing children.

In the years that followed, John Walsh worked tirelessly to get the word out about Adam and other missing children. He created educational programs that were implemented in schools. He urged parents to take the lead and teach their children about “Stranger Danger”. My mom jumped on board, and whether she intended to or not she instilled in me an intense fear of being kidnapped.

Some 30ish years later I found myself shopping in JC Penny. My then one year old daughter wondered away from me and in the 90 seconds (that seemed like forever) that my daughter was “missing” I realized that I had a very intense phobia – the phobia that my children would be taken from me.

I know I’m not the only mom out there that worries that our children will wonder off. We worry that someone will grab them in the store. We worry that the park or playground will no longer be a safe place for our children to play.

So what is a parent to do? Parents can be proactive in their habits with their children. They can educate their children in ways to help in the event the unthinkable happens.

• Keep an eye on your children. I know this sounds like a no-brainer, but I’m constantly amazed by the number of children I see in public and it appears no one is paying them any attention.
• Keep your small children contained when shopping. Just because your one year old can walk doesn’t mean they need to be walking around at Walmart. If you have toddlers that have outgrown the buggy asked for a “toddler” cart. Most stores have them, you just have to ask.
• Don’t walk away from your shopping cart/stroller/wagon/etc. We’ve all seen the terrifying video of the kid being snatched from the shopping cart with mom standing nearby.
• Teach your older children to stay with you. Nothing makes my daughter madder than having to ride in the buggy at Walmart, but when she thinks she’s big enough to wonder off on her own that’s where she ends up.
• Don’t let your kids shop alone. I remember when I was very young and it was seemingly safe for my brother and me to hang out in the toy section while mom did all the shopping. Not the best idea these days.
• Teach your children what to do if they do get grabbed. Scream, kick, punch, run. I try to teach my daughter to do whatever it takes to hurt the person that grabbed her and to make sure everyone in the store can hear her screaming!
• Teach your children your names. My kids know we are Mommy and Daddy, but we also teach them we are Karen and Bobby. Our daughter also knows the actual names of her Mimi, Buddy, Lollie and Pop.
• Use common sense! It sounds simple enough, but we all know those parents that don’t seem to use it at times.

I’m by no means a parenting expert, but these are what we do at our house with a one and four year old. What are you doing at your house to cure the kidnapphobia (yea, I made that up).

Karen Weido is a full time wife, full time mom, and works full time in Healthcare Marketing & Public Relations. She and her family live in Southwest Arkansas.  She has been sharing her family’s stories and activities on Ting’s Mom Blog since 2010.  In her spare minutes she tries to read, is learning to cook, and runs around in the backyard with her kids. Karen can also be found creeping around (and often posting) on Twitter and Instagram.

Are you afraid of spiders?
 

Are you afraid of heights?
 

Are you afraid of clowns? (Yikes! I am!)
 

Are you afraid of writing for ARWB?
 
Well don’t be! Our goal is to share your story in the way you want to tell it. We’re not going to pick it apart, criticize it, or flat out reject you. If you think it’s worth sharing there is a REALLY good chance we think it is too.

We are able to bring you great content because our members (that’s YOU) submit us great content. Without you guys, ARWB would be nothing. Submitting content to us is so easy, too. All you have to do is email me (julie@arkansaswomenbloggers.com) and let me know you are interested in submitting a piece and what topic it falls under. (Not sure what the topics are? Check the sidebar. They are listed there and we usually list them 2-3 months in advance.) I’ll email you back with a deadline and you just need to submit your story on or before your deadline. That’s it!

Right now were looking for writers to cover the topic of PHOBIAS. Our topics are intentionally vague so you can interpret them in the way that works for you. Email me NOW and tell me you want to write!

I DARE YOU!

Back to school is almost bittersweet
By Jamie Smith

I remember how, as the new school year approached each year, we would head to Target to choose our school supplies. I loved it. I still love school supplies.

Back then it was important to make sure I got a wide assortment of puppy folders and a couple more by Lisa Frank. The glittery folders were more expensive, so we only got a couple of them. But those were the folders to have. Anyone remember Trapper Keepers? Those were cool, too. Although I think I enjoyed the cloth versions more because you could cram a lot more into those zippered binders.

As an adult, the first day of school took on a different meaning for me. See, I accomplished my childhood dream of becoming a journalist. I quickly learned as a general assignment reporter that my favorite beat was education. My second “grown up job” was as the education beat reporter for the Benton County Daily Record. For seven years and 10 months, I interviewed about, wrote about and at times it seemed breathed about education.

As each new school year approached, I made sure I prepared readers for what was to come including features on each school district. I also reminded people about back to school traffic, something that I even wrote about on my blog last year.

After being laid off from my reporting job a few years ago, I couldn’t help but still be aware of the school year calendar. I always knew when school started, always knew when school elections took place. Part of me was a little sad that it was no longer a part of my life, but I also couldn’t help but chuckle at all the stories I saw the new education reporters have to write-or when I’d see a controversy come up that they had to cover. All I could think was “hahaha not my problem!”
Then came this year. I even went school supply shopping for a Champions for Kids SIMPLE Service project. But somehow this year the start of school really snuck up on me and I have to admit, I was sad. Sure, school supplies are still cool but I couldn’t help but feel like “where did summer go? Why can’t the kids have more time?”

What were your feelings about back to school this year? Do your feelings vary now that you’re an adult compared to when you were a kid? Leave a comment!

Jamie Smith writes over at JamiesThots.com where she shares about faith, family, food and just a whole lotta thots!

Playing Our Positions
Written by Cara Coleman of The Front Porch Ramblings

If you haven’t had a chance to watch 4 year olds play t-ball I highly suggest doing so at some point. There is really nothing quite cuter than a tiny kiddo in baseball pants that are 2 sizes too big and a helmet that makes them look like a little bobble head running around. Every little boy would step up to the plate but wouldn’t dare swing the bat before yelling, “Momma, are you watching me?” Melted every heart every time.

One thing that didn’t go unnoticed was the players abilities to play every position…every time. For example, someone from the opposing team would hit the ball (I use that term loosely) and within seconds the whole team would be in a dog pile fighting for that baseball. I take that back. There were a few kids that were slightly distracted by the dirt castle they had been diligently working on for 7 innings and that one kid who was chasing the butterfly. But you get the picture. No one played his position. Now I completely understand we are talking about 4 year old here. But I learned an important lesson that day. To play my position and play it well.

I couldn’t help but wonder what that looked like for us ladies. I know that within each one of us is a God given gift. They look very different from one another but we have them. We are great cooks, writers, teachers, encouragers and the list goes on and on. And in my eyes those gifts began to look more like appointed positions that the Lord has given us to play. But what often happens is we get distracted because someone else’s position looks more fun. So we leave our spot on the field and run over and try to be the first baseman too. Or the short stop may be getting more action so we want to run over and be the short stop as well. We may be like the kid who just sits down in the dirt and doesn’t even want to participate in the game. (Lets hope not though). You get the point, right?!

The team never functions as it should because everyone is leaving the position they excel at to be a little of everyone else’s.

I’ve learned this lesson the hard way. I am the first to say “yes” to any and every opportunity to volunteer my time, minister to others through bible study or fill a role in some committee. While they are all great things to be involved in and worthy of my time, I feel complete burn out and a little bitterness halfway through the experience. Why? Because I cannot play all of those positions and play them well. I began to realize that my “Yes” was probably taking someone else’s position from them. But we do this over and over don’t we? It makes us feel so important.

I have a feeling we all know what our given position is. It’s that thing that stirs your heart. It’s that thing that your mind wonders to when at rest. That’s the place where we should spend the majority of our time and be giving our best efforts.

So lets hike up those baseball pants, throw our hair in a ponytail on top or our head, get our glove and head out on that field to play our position and cheer all of our teammates on as they play their positions too.

Cara Coleman was born and raised a delta girl but now lives in Mountain Home with her husband and two sweet munchkins, Whitten and Ford. She enjoys the Razorbacks, fashion, the outdoors and bringing awareness to mission opportunities around the state.
You can catch me at http://www.thefrontporchramblings.net rambling on about His goodness in my life.

Setting Your Child Up for Success this School Year
Written by Whitney Jordan of Polka-Dotty Place

It’s that time of year again: school supplies, packing lunches, new clothes and homework. The start of the school year often means busy schedules, after school activities and a faster pace of life for many families. There are numerous things you can do to set your child up for success in the classroom and I’m excited to share some ideas with you.

1. Inquire about what your child is learning each day. Many teachers write newsletters, blogs or have class websites for you to access. Explore these resources often to make sure that you are in the loop and involved in your child’s education. Ask your child about the highlights and the low points of their day. Kids often have a hard time verbalizing their feelings, summarizing their activities and they really benefit when you ask them specific questions. For example, “What did you write about today?, Who did you play with at school?, What activities did you do for math?, Which planet were you researching today?, How were you a good friend?, and Was anything challenging for you?” You can even ask them to describe or list things for you: describe your classroom, tell me about your seating arrangement, explain what you do in music class or tell me about your daily routine. Prompts will promote discussion in your home and give your kids a great launching point to go into detail about their day.

2. Encourage them to read! Ask about the reading they are doing at school, contact their teacher to identify their reading level, ask for suggested reading materials for your child, befriend the school librarian and ask for reading suggestions based on your child’s interests, check out books at the library, download e-books to their tablets or buy books from local bookstores or book orders. There are many wonderful children’s books and your child will likely need help discovering books that would be suitable for their reading level, have appropriate content and be of interest to them. You can also read books together. Most kids would love to enjoy a good book with their parents and reading together is a great way to get them excited about a variety books. You can read more challenging books aloud to them and talk through the characters and storyline to ensure they are comprehending the material.

3. Participate in the classroom. Volunteering in the classroom is helpful to the teachers and it allows you to get a feel for the environment that your child spends a significant amount of their day in. If you are a working parent, you could volunteer for field trips, help with before and after school activities or offer to help work on projects at home for the teacher. Each teacher is different and will provide you with varying opportunities to be a part of your child’s classroom. Be sure to investigate the options that you have to incorporate yourself in your child’s learning. Be proactive! Attend parent teacher conferences and get to know your child’s teacher. If you know your child struggles in math or reading, start seeking out help early in the year before they fall too far behind. Meet with your child’s teacher to ask for additional resources that you could work with at home, ask about special services at school if applicable, look into having your child participate in tutoring and be your child’s advocate. It is in everyone’s best interest to start working to help your child right away.

4. Have a homework routine. The majority of children thrive with a routine and enjoy having clear expectations for learning at home. There is no right way to do homework and you have to identify the set up that works best for your family. Some options would be: eat a snack right after school and then start on homework; do after school activities, dinner and then start on homework; or some families prefer to leave time before school to complete homework. It is important to schedule time to complete work and to make it as enjoyable as possible for everyone involved. Review any class work that comes home with your child. Ask your child to explain how they did an activity or to teach you how to do the concept that they worked on in class. It’s difficult for teachers to meet with every student to review each item that they missed, therefore, it is really beneficial for learning if parents can do this at home. Also, teach your child how to clean out their backpack regularly and to stay organized; this will save them tons of time searching through a mess and teach them a great life skill.

5. Find fun ways for your child to learn outside of the classroom. Doing the same thing over and over again would bore anyone so it’s important to be innovative when looking for learning opportunities for your child. There are many free educational apps for phones and tablets, tons of free learning games on-line when you search for a specific content area, you can purchase flash cards or educational games for your child to play at home, get them an educational magazine subscription, buy or borrow many books on a topic they are studying at school to enhance their learning or you could even take them on little outings to learn more about things they are studying. Change it up and let your child have some choice in deciding how they’d like to practice at home. Kids love to be given a choice in the types of activities they do. Give them a few options that you approve of and they will be excited to choose how they are going to learn.

Hello! My name is Whitney and I blog at Polka-Dotty Place. I taught 1st-3rd grade for the last 10 years and am crazy about teaching. I am a brand new mom to Olive; I love to blog, organize, make lists, bake, accessorize and watch football. I just moved to the South and am enjoying the sea of monograms, friendly people and crape myrtles.

Written by Lela Davidson of After the Bubbly, ARWB Miss September 2013
Got Back-to-School Resolutions?

Fall is my favorite time of year, and not only because it’s time to put the bathing suits away and pull out the jeans. I love fall for crockpots full of slow-cooked love, the promise of holidays without the stress, and brand new Sharpies. Back-to-school means new beginnings, fresh projects, clean chalkboards, and an unsullied planner filled with empty boxes. Fall has always been like New Year’s for me and with so much more energy. By January I’m be too tired and cold bored with food that’s been simmering on low all day. By January I’m be ready for frozen margaritas and days at the lake. That’s no time for making change. I may be getting ahead of myself, but this year I’m setting Back-to-School resolutions.

I will get dressed every day.

And by dressed, I mean something a little more than yoga pants. Ugh, yes. Each and every day. It’s a lot, but important considering I have a new job where I work in an office with other live humans every weekday. Hence, the need for pants. I cannot promise fashion, necessarily, but I’ll vow to get [most of] my outfits cleared by my in-house stylist. She’s 13 so you know I’ll be looking good. Forever 43, here I come.

I will say yes to external deadlines.

Writers need deadlines. Given the new job I won’t have as much time to write, and even less time to look out the window wondering what I should write. There is no room for try in my new schedule. There is only write or do not write. To write I need that external deadline. So, thank you, Arkansas Women Bloggers, for making me write today.

I will practice yoga every day.

This resolution started back in January when practiced every day for 40 days in the misguided belief that at the end of six weeks I would magically want to twist myself into a human garlic knot each day. Turns out nothing is automatic. So I’m trying 120 days this time. I’ll cue up the podcast even on the days I don’t want to, even when I’d rather binge on Orange is the New Black than roll out my mat, even when I’m cranky. Especially when I’m cranky.

I will flirt with the F-word.

I abhor failure. It’s such a Loser. I know this is politically incorrect as we are all supposed to embrace putting it all out there in pursuit of our passions and ambitions. But damn it, losing sucks. I’m one of those horrible perfectionist know-it-alls who’d rather get everything right, sometimes at the expense of getting the right things. So I’m working on thinking bigger and risking more. I’m not promising wild abandon. Spreadsheets will still be consulted, but mistakes will be made. And that’s okay.

I will synchronize my calendars and activate my village.

A family of two working parents, two active and non-driving teenagers, and a dog with occasional intestinal distress presents certain scheduling challenges. There will be times I just cannot do it all, and I will ask for help. In order to do this I know where it is I’m supposed to be. For that I’ll need to consolidate the various demands on my time into a single location where now there are many. In the last month I’ve gone from one calendar to four. Something’s got to give. Google, take me away!

What will you do this New Year’s / Back-to-School season? If you’ve got resolutions, please share them in the comments.