Friendship for Good
Written by Jody Dilday, Miss February 2014

Thinking about February’s Theme “Using our Voices to Change the World” immediately calls to mind my group of “do-gooder” friends. If you’ll indulge me, I’d like to tell you who we are and how we got started.

In April of 2008 I got a phone call from a lady in my neighborhood I knew but not well. I knew that she worked as the Community Giving manager for one of the most respected companies in Fayetteville, but she and I had spoken only once in a professional setting. Lisa said she had an idea that she wanted to share with me and a handful of other women, and would I come over one night next week for a glass of wine? Ummmmm….. Sure!

On the appointed evening six women gathered around Lisa’s kitchen table. Each of us, at Lisa’s direction, had brought an appetizer to share. As we introduced ourselves to one another (most of us were strangers, only connected somehow to Lisa) and shared a meal, Lisa began to share her vision with us.

She told us that several years earlier, she read an article in Real Simple magazine about a group of women in Washington, D.C. This group of friends gathered once a month for a “girl’s night out” at various restaurants around DC. One night, one member made an observation about how much money they were spending each month dining out, when what they really looked forward to was their time together. They decided then and there to continue their monthly gatherings, but to do them “potluck” style and contribute the money they WOULD HAVE SPENT on dinner into an account to help others in need. They called themselves “Womenade.”

Lisa was inspired by the idea. But as a busy working mom with 3 teenagers, she didn’t have the time to add one more thing to her life. So, she clipped that article and hung onto it . . .for FIVE years! Fast forward to April 2008. Lisa felt that now she had the time, and she still had the interest, so she picked up the phone and extended an invitation to women she thought were like-minded and whom she wanted to foster a friendship with. And here we all were.

Needless to say, we loved the idea. And because the founders of Washington Womenade wanted the concept to spread and did NOT want there to be any formality or red tape associated with their idea, Womenade of NWA was born that night.

Over the past 5 years we’ve met each month (sometimes taking a summer hiatus) at a different member’s home. We all try to bring a dish to share each month. Sometimes that’s a take out pizza and sometimes it’s a bag of chips, but mostly we bring something we prepared at home. Dues are $25 a month, and we have a Womenade NWA checking account. We are not a registered charity (no bylaws! Yippee!) so our gifts are not tax deductible. It’s philanthropy for philanthropy’s sake.

When one of our members hears of a need in the community, we bring it to the group. Collectively we decide whether we should give money or help them “connect the dots” to other resources in the community. Ideally, we want to help out in situations where individuals would otherwise “fall through the cracks.” Our little group of women and our collective $25 gifts have kept a young pregnant couple from being evicted from their home; we’ve helped a single mom and her daughter furnish an apartment when theirs was destroyed in an explosion, and we’ve contributed to a fund to help bury a boy killed in a fire.

We’ve also harnessed the power of our individual networks to raise awareness and support for causes we believe in. We hold two large gatherings each year where some needed item serves as admission. Great food, beverages, networking, and SILLINESS are signatures of Womenade parties. At each gathering, we share the concept of Womenade and encourage others to begin their own Womenade groups.

Some examples of our parties include:

• Womenade Panty Raid – collected 360 pairs of new underwear for the Families in Transition Program at Fayetteville High School
• Bring Bling – collected gently used prom dresses and accessories for the Glass Slipper Project at Fayetteville High School
• Supporting the Girls – a crazy bra-decorating contest held each fall (now in its 4th year!) has collected hundreds of new bras for area women’s shelters
• Womenade PJ Party – the biggest and best slumber party NWA has ever seen! Also in its 4th year, the PJ Party is held the Friday or Saturday night before Super Bowl Sunday. It’s an all night dance/food/gab fest at the Courtyard by Marriott in Fayetteveille. Admission is a NEW pair of pajamas for the area women’s shelters.

@JDilday with a group of friends affectionately known as the “Lutheran Chicks” at the #NWAPJParty14 on February 1, 2014.

As a social worker by training, a non-profit executive by profession, and a “do-gooder” at heart, I find that Womenade of NWA has been another outlet of service for me. And yet it is so much more. These Womenade ladies have become some of my closest friends. They are role models to me. They are my sounding board, encouragers, and confidants. We are Womenade.

If you’d like more information about starting Womenade with your friends, email me at @jodydilday@gmail.com and I’ll be happy to help you out!