by Connie Ash

Kelly McGillis said “Life is a journey and it’s about growing and changing and coming to terms with who and what you are and loving who and what you are.”  

The last 20 years of my journey have been about growing and changing and coming to terms with who and what I am and loving who and what I have become, while realizing that life is like a wheelbarrow – if you overload a wheelbarrow it becomes off balanced,  it falls over and things fall out, get run-over, or broken.   

Most of us have career plans, financial plans, family plans – the points we want to reach on our journey.  For me my career goals began when I became a registered nurse.  I immediately realized that education opens doors. So I set my career plans – a Bachelor’s Degree before 35 and my Master’s Degree before 40.  I hit every mark – my journey wasn’t all smooth but I made it to each point on time.

Feeling like I needed to keep moving I started a doctorate, wrote three chapters of my dissertation. Then my journey stepped off in a different direction – I enrolled in a family nurse practitioner program.   This is where I realized I was trying to fit 20 plus hours of activity in each day.  I had a fulltime job as the director of clinical support for a local hospital system, I was managing a free health clinic, taking care of my family and 14 rescue dogs, and volunteering with the local humane society, Red Cross, my church and a political organization.  In my spare time (I know some of you are saying –what spare time) I was trying to keep active by running.

Finding balance is not easy when life pulls us to be everything to everyone.  When we see Facebook post, blogs, and Instagram phots of women doing it all, work, family, crafts, working out, and volunteer activities, we want to be that person. We are taught at a young age we can have it all.  Yes, we can have it all, but have you ever tried to push a basket or a wheelbarrow over flowing with stuff – it is hard to push and sometimes it falls over, because it is out of balance. 

To find a balance in the journey of life you must first – stop, unload some of what you are carrying or trying to fit into your life, balance the wheelbarrow.

What are the correct items to put in the wheelbarrow?  I try to keep things simple – so my balanced wheelbarrow includes only four things:

• Spirituality – Develop a spiritual life is important.  I take time to strengthen my spirituality by going to church and reading devotional books.  I set aside time each day to talk with God and not just to him. Just as academic knowledge can have power and open doors, so can spirituality. 

• Family – Relationships are important.  I am spending time developing a strong bond with my family, I strive to give as much attention to my family as I do my career.  In the blink of an eye your family can be gone, tell them you love, listen to them with intention, and most importantly make lasting memories.  I do not want my family to remember me in constant motion – but rather to remember the time we spent together cherishing each moment we have together.

• Health – are bodies are made for motion and for rest.  There is no need for heavy workouts, a thirty-minute walk or jog daily or even dancing inside the house, is all you need.   I have come to realize that rest can be quite time, a nap, or a minimum six full hours of sleep.

• Work – you will never have a balanced life if you are unhappy with your career. It is vital that you have a job that you love or can learn to love, otherwise you will always be complaining and dreading the hours of work. I love being a nurse practitioner I can’t imagine doing anything else.

Is my life always in balance? No – but I know now, when I am out of balance – I know when my wheelbarrow is starting tip over.  
Do you know when your wheelbarrow is starting to tip over?  How do you find balance? 

~ Connie ~

Connie Ash is a  50-something wife, mother, Nana, doggie mom, vegetarian, living in the small community of Blytheville, AR. located in the far Northeast corner of the State. She shares a home with my husband aka The Big Man, our 14 rescue dogs and six chickens. Collectively they have five adult near-perfect children and five perfect grandboys and 2 awesome granddogs.  Currently, she is a family nurse practitioner in a small family practice,  manages a free health clinic (Great River Charitable Clinic), and is the proud owner of Bed and Biscuit Boarding. Her hobbies include scrapbooking, trout fishing, volunteering with the local humane society and running.