Category: Theme Thursday

Celebrating Life’s Happies

Recently, I’ve been reading the book Fight Back with Joy by Margaret Feinberg. In it, she describes the small joyful things in life as joy bombs. Picture these bombs dropping into your life and exploding into happiness. Those bombs are things like a beautiful sunset. The laughter of a friend. Even things like sale on those boots you’ve been eyeing. Any little thing that brings you happiness. I love paying extra attention to these happies and bringing them significance.

One way we do that in our family is to celebrate the happies. Make them bigger deals. Get recognition at work? Celebrate. Make a milestone? Celebrate. Have a half-birthday? Celebrate. Book a fun vacation? Celebrate.

In our first year of marriage, we celebrated the happies by having mini-celebrations each month on our anniversary date. So that meant that each month on the 13^th, I brought home a little treat to share. The girls at Rick’s Bakery in Fayetteville got to know me well. I would grab a set of petit fours or a frosted cookie or a couple of donuts. Anything to mark the occasion and celebrate.

Another fun tradition we have is the “You’re Special” plate. I don’t remember where I picked it up, but it brings us much joy. If you come home with a promotion, you get to eat dinner on the “You’re Special” plate. If it’s your half-birthday, out comes the plate. Sometimes special meals are served on the plate. For example, my husband LOVES Buffalo Wild Wings. So one night I picked it up for us for dinner (just because) and served it on the “You’re Special” plate to show him a little extra love.

you are special plate

I think the small things in life deserve celebration. If we save all the honor for big days, the small insignificant happy things get swept under the rug. Instead, I think about how I want to live my life LOUD – and make a fuss about the small things.

I’ve been known to show up to a girls’ night with party hats just because. If someone asks what we’re all celebrating, I respond “Friendship!” And isn’t a beautiful friendship something to celebrate? Or bring noise makers to a child’s basketball game. Make a small thing into a big thing. In high school and college we would buy helium balloons and tie them to friends’ car antennas. They were bursts of joy in ordinary days.

Find a way to celebrate the small things today. You’ll never regret a party – even if it’s an entirely made up occasion.

Brittney is a native Arkansan with a love for bright lights and big city. She often escapes her 20-acre home south of Fort Smith to shop, eat, and catch a concert in the big city. She blogs about her life, her faith, her adventures, her dogs, and her country home at Razorback Britt.

Celebrating Tradition: Three Generations of Crochet

Three Generations of Crochet

This time of year is full of many celebrations. Celebrating the New Year has me in a time of reflection. The older I get the more I prefer to celebrate traditions over anything else. One tradition that came to mind was the passing on of knowledge. Old, lost arts like crochet and knitting.

Crochet is what my grandmother and my mother do best. What is crochet? Crochet is where you strategically weave yarn to form different pieces. Oh the amazing things you can crochet. Scarves, blankets, gloves, hats, and so much more.

Grandmother's Multicolor Chevron Afghan

My Grandma Dorotha was amazingly talented at crochet. She would spend hours working away. Her afghans had beautiful colors and were the perfect way to snuggle up under on a cold day. Even as a very young child, I wanted to know how to do it myself. I remember getting my first book and crochet needles. I would chain on and on for hours on end.

Mother's Crochet A Rose in a Field of Flowers

As I got older I lost interest, but my mom started to pick it up again. Crochet is almost like therapy. It’s one of those tasks that take skill and concentration. You’re able to zone out of all of your problems and enjoy the creation in your hands. When we lost so much after the tornado in April of 2014, I think my most missed piece is the beautiful, ornate crochet blanket that my mom made for me. It was blue, my favorite color, and now knowing crochet helped me realize how much time she had to have put into it. She recently gave me a bag of yarn that has the remnants from that blanket that I hope to do something with even though it’s not enough for a blanket.

Upclose Shot of Double Crochet Stitch

Through the struggles after and the enormous amount of stress and anxiety, I found the need for that crochet therapy. I looked for some yarn and bought me a new J hook. While I learned the basics from my grandmother, I found YouTube helpful in her absence. So many wonderful ladies keeping this art alive. I have been able to expand my knowledge of more stitches and techniques and am now working on my very first afghan. Just like my mom and her mom would make.

My Chevron Pattern in Blue

I even see my own daughter taking interest in my crochet and it fills me with such joy. Three generations of our Arkansas ladies that have learned crochet with possibly of a fourth inspired to learn this intricate art. There is such a feeling of accomplishment when you are able to make something with your own hands. I am so thankful to have had two beautiful women who have shown me the value of keeping this skill alive.

Ami Lee Biography Photo Ami Lee is a paleo mom turned food blogger trying to feed her 3 kids and LEO husband gluten and dairy free, among other things. She’s not a professional chef, but what she lacks in education she makes up for it with a little bit of common sense and a lot of love. Inspired by many chefs including Julia Child, Gordon Ramsay, and Emeril Lagasse, she is encouraged to try new things and do what she does best… Make it up as she goes along.

10 Ways to Make Christmas Magical for Toddlers

Christmas is a wonderful time to be a child.

Magic fills the air at every corner during the month of December: from Christmas movies, to music, to beautifully decorated stores with endless amounts of toys on display, to homes filled with baked goodies, laughter, and lighted trees.

I have always rather enjoyed the Christmas season, but now, as a mother of two littles, it has taken on a new life. Watching them experience the magic of Christmas warms my soul and fills my heart to the brim.

Toddlers have a special way of making the most out of the simplest things. Don’t believe me? Give an empty box to a toddler and watch them play for hours.

It really doesn’t take much to make Christmas special for your littles, but I do think something can be said for a little planning and purpose.

Therefore, I have created a list of 10 Ways to Make Christmas Magical for Toddlers.

1. Advent Calendar

An advent calendar is an easy way to fit in all of your Christmas traditions and activities. Our calendar for this year is mostly filled with things we would have done anyway… it just puts it in writing so that we don’t forget them.

We will also be completing a scripture Advent Calendar that will help us keep the focus on Christ daily throughout this season. Head over to RedBird-Blue to grab your FREE Advent Scripture Calendar. (Trust me, it really is amazing!)

2. Christmas Movie Night

Plug in the Christmas tree, turn off the lights, put on your pajamas, move your phone out of reach, and grab a bowl of popcorn as you watch one of your favorite family Christmas movies together. This tradition is one that you can start with your toddlers and continue on through the years… no matter how old they get!

3. Wrapped Christmas Books

In our household, we started this tradition my son’s very first Christmas. This one takes a little extra work, but it is completely worth it!

Wrap 25 Christmas books, one for each day of December leading up to Christmas, and enjoy 10 minutes every night as your toddler unwraps a book and you read it together as a family.

Don’t have 25 Christmas books? No problem! Add one or two books to your collection each year, and supplement with a trip to the library. Even if you only have five Christmas books currently, wrap those up and countdown the last five days before Christmas. Each year you can add more days as you add more books to your collection.

*Tip* If using an Advent Calendar, coordinate your books with your Christmas activities. This year, I numbered the books and wrote that number with a sharpie on the wrapping paper. That way, on the day we watch How the Grinch Stole Christmas, I can find the number to match the book, and can have our toddlers open that specific story for our nightly reading.

4. Christmas Lights

We all add lights to our tree, but this year, add lights somewhere a little more non-traditional. Place them on the ceiling of a small hallway, in a cardboard box, or above their bed and lay down with them as you stare at the lights (even better if you use moving lights) and talk about how beautiful the star over Bethlehem must have been.

5. Letter to Santa

Writing letters to Santa is a great bonding experience with your child. Sit at the kitchen table together, and read out loud as you write the greeting to Santa, and have your child help you fill out their list. For your littlest babies, you may have to do some prompting, but record everything they say. This not only feeds into the magic of Christmas, but also makes for great keepsakes through the years.

6. Felt Christmas Tree

If your toddlers are anything like mine, they desperately want to help decorate your Christmas tree. Therefore, it can quickly become a time of frustration instead of joy. Simple solution? Distract your babes from your tree with their own Felt Christmas Tree that they can decorate again and again any time they want.

7. Visit Santa

Santa is one of the most magical parts of Christmas. We read about him, sing about him, and talk about him all throughout the Christmas season. Keep the Santa magic alive by going to visit him at your local mall or during a Christmas event such as a downtown Christmas parade.

8. Christmas Eve Box

This is another tradition that we began my son’s first Christmas and have fallen in love with it. Allow your children to open up one present on Christmas Eve that consists of new pajamas (which are great for Christmas morning pictures), a new Christmas book or movie, and even some other small goodies such as a candy cane or hot chocolate mix.

9. Treats for Santa

I found this plate for $1 at Target this Christmas season, but have since seen many stores with plates very similar. Fill the plate on Christmas Eve and watch the magic light up in their eyes when they find the goodies half eaten on Christmas morning.

*Since we will have already written a letter to Santa, the letter section on this particular plate will be used to write a thank you to Santa for bringing them gifts.

10. Special Christmas Wrapping Paper

For each child, choose a different wrapping paper and wrap all of their gifts in their special paper. Seeing gifts under the tree wrapped in fun paper (such as the pictured: Cars Christmas Paper or Minnie Mouse Christmas) will only add to the excitement of opening gifts. As they get older, choose more nondescript paper, and they will have to guess which paper is theirs. Part of the fun will be in listening to their guesses all throughout December! Place a tiny scrap of the wrapping paper in the bottom of each child’s stocking so that on Christmas morning they will have to empty their stockings first to discover which wrapping paper is actually theirs.

There you have it! 10 Ways to Make Christmas Magical for Toddlers. I hope it inspired you to add a new activity to your Christmas traditions this year.

Quick disclaimer: I do not expect anyone to be super Mom or Dad and complete the entire list! Feel free to let yourself off the hook and just choose one or two ideas for this Christmas season. Anything you do will lend itself to great memories and traditions for your child! Enjoy this time to the fullest and leave the parental guilt behind.

I pray a wonderful Christmas season to you and yours!

My given name is Rachel, although the name I am called more than any other these days is Momma. Recently, my husband, Jonathan, and I decided to put my teaching career on pause to stay at home and focus on our two children. Ponytails and Pajamas documents our journey. Visit our website at www.ponytailsandpajamas.com

Channeling the Magic of Childhood

by Tiffany Hathorn

The Magic of Childhood

As adults, we often get so caught up in the “rat race” of life that we fail to truly enjoy or even appreciate life. Not necessarily in the grand ways – in the little, everyday ways. We don’t take the time to stop and acknowledge the little joys because we are so focused on our big responsibilities. Some would argue that it is best to focus on the big picture. To not let the little things distract you. However, I disagree.

One thing that I have been taught by watching and engaging with my son is that sometimes you really need to just step back and appreciate. To view the world through the eyes of a child.

You see, children have this really innocent way of viewing the world. To them, life is full of magic and wonder. Have you ever seen the way a child’s eyes will light up in awe at the sight of something as common as the sunset? Felt their genuine excitement at the beautiful colors painting the sky? Have you ever watched their glee as they caught sight of a squirrel for the first time, as it jumps from branch to branch above their heads? Listened to their peals of laughter as they laughed at the same joke for the 5^th time – as though it became more amusing with each telling?

Children are able to undertake the serious tasks of learning about themselves, the world around them, and the ways in which they must navigate it. I mean, it can’t be easy having to learn to move, talk, read, write, think, solve problems, and the myriad of skills that set them up for the rest of their lives. However, they don’t allow this hard work to distract them from or rob them of their ability to enjoy the world and the many experiences it has to offer – however ‘ordinary’ those experiences may be.

When was the last time that you paused in your day and the took time to just look around? To be present and truly take in the things around you? I recently had a tough life situation arise. One which felt vastly overwhelming. My instinct, as an adult, was to throw myself into being busy. To work, work, work until I changed my situation. You would think that would be the best solution, right? However, what I found was that instead of things becoming easier, I simply became more overwhelmed. That was when I decided to take a page from the book of childhood. To the take time to appreciate the small things. To allow myself to be amazed by life and all that it has to offer. When I stopped long enough to enjoy the small things, it became a bit easier to face the big things.

I began taking walks and instead of simply being focused on getting from point A to point B, I enjoyed the sights and sounds along the way. I sat out on my porch and enjoyed the bounty of nature that is right outside my door. I stopped multitasking so much and actually focused on one thing at a time (which is another thing I have learned from my son). In short, I chose to be present in my life instead of simply focusing on getting through it.

Life is made up of days and we often focus on just making it from one day to the next. However, if we are so focused on mere survival that we forget to live, we will get to the end of our lives and realize just how much we missed that was right in front of us.

So I implore you – invoke the magic of childhood in your life. Every single day. All you have to do is open your eyes and look around. You might find that the bit of magic missing from your life has been all around you this entire time.

A professional word wrangler, mom to a superhero, and proud geek (circa 1985), Tiffany Hathorn can be found blogging at Single Mommy Warrior, traveling multiple universes (her favorite being the world of Harry Potter), binge-watching Netflix, or plotting world domination.

A Bagful of Magic: Children’s Holiday Books

Debbie Arnold

Reading. What a gift we can give to ourselves and our children. As writers, parents and teachers we know how important it is to model reading and to instill the love of that into our children. I hope you’ve been reading a holiday story to your children each day, but just in case you need some suggestions, I have a few. Fill a bagful of holiday kids’ books with these favorites:

santa's bag

A Christmas Treasury by Stephanie Nettell (Ed.) contains a well-chosen selection of holiday poems and stories. I especially like that it contains excerpts from Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol.
Jan Brett’s Christmas Treasury combines seven of Brett’s best-selling, beloved books: The Mitten, The Wild Christmas Reindeer, Trouble with Trolls, The Twelve Days of Christmas, The Hat, Christmas Trolls, and The Night Before Christmas. Like all of her books, this one has amazing art work and is generally recognized as one of the finest children’s books on the market today. That said, it is expensive. Consider it an investment or suggest to grandparents, aunts or uncles what a nice gift it would be. This absolutely beautiful book will become a family heirloom.
The Night Before Christmas (A Visit From St. Nicholas)- the classic attributed to Clement Clarke Moore. How could you not share this one. Don’t visions of sugarplums still dance in our heads? This one is not to be missed.
Olive, the Other Reindeer by Otto Seibold and Vivian Walsh. Olive is a quirky little dog who misunderstands the lyrics of “Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer” hearing “Olive, the other reindeer” and heads off to the North Pole to become Santa’s helper. The illustrations are computer generated and the narrative is humorous.
The Little Reindeer by author and illustrator Michael Foreman is a sweet tale about reindeer that accidentally gets wrapped up as a gift for a little boy by Santa’s elves. The little boy keeps his new pet a secret even after the reindeer learns to fly and heads back to Santa’s workshop.
Seven Candles for Kwanzaa by Andrea Pinkney. I bought this one several years ago and still enjoy sharing it. It’s a great way to introduce children to the traditions and principles of Kwanzaa.
The Polar Express by Chris Van Allsburg has been around for several years but remains one of our all-time favorites. It’s a beautiful book — both the story it tells and the illustrations it presents. Watch the movie starring Tom Hanks if you get the chance .
The Christmas Story, first published in 1952 by Little Golden Books, was written by author Jane Werner Watson and illustrated by my absolute favorite Little Golden Book illustrator, Eloise Wilkin. It’s such a beautiful little book and an excellent presentation of the birth of Jesus.
How the Grinch Stole Christmas by Dr. Seuss. Can we have a Christmas without Cindy Lou, Max and the Grinch? I never tire of reading this one out loud with its twisting rhythm and creative language. Even the youngest can grasp the truth of this one. Buy it in hardback because, if your little ones are like mine, you’ll wear a paperback out very quickly.
Snowmen at Christmas by Caralyn and Mark Buehner is a companion to Snowmen at Night and continues the adventures of the snowmen at Christmastime. Just like Grinch, this one is meant to be read aloud.
Mortimer’s Christmas Manger – by Karma Wilson is another perfect read aloud choice. When Mortimer takes up residence in a manger scene and one by one moves the nativity “residents” out. Then one night he overhears the story of Christmas and the birth of Jesus and realizes that the bed he has been enjoying really belongs to the Baby Jesus.
The Legend of the Christmas Cookie by Dandi Mackall tells the story of a young boy named Jack who learns of his family’s tradition of baking cookies and sharing the story of the birth of Jesus with needy families. In doing so, he learns to become a cheerful giver. There’s also a cookie recipe included which could be made with your children.
The Christmas Miracle of Jonathan Toomey by Susan Wojciechowski is more appropriate for younger elementary children than preschoolers even though it appears to be a lovely picture book at first. Mr. Toomey was a woodcarver who spent his days alone and always seemed gloomy. No one knows the reason why until the Widow McDowell and her son ask Toomey to carve some special characters for them — ones they had lost in a move. It’s not only a beautiful story relating the true meaning of Christmas, it’s the story of love lost and love found. I wonder if you will read it without tears.
How about these classic Little Golden Books: The Animals’ Christmas Eve, The Christmas Story, The Little Christmas Elf, The Night Before Christmas; and The Poky Little Puppy’s First Christmas and The Twelve Days of Christmas.
The Best Christmas Pageant Ever– Barbara Robinson’s classic tale of the Herdmans’ interpretation of the Christmas story. If you’ve never read and shared this one, do yourself a favor and get a copy today. It’s funny and laughable, but it’s also heartwarming. It’s a reading must.
A Christmas Carol – Charles Dickens. I’m rather partial to this one after having taught it for so many years. Find a good adaptation — not the Mickey Mouse or Barbie versions, but one that is truer to Dickens’ original allegory. While Dickens did not write A Christmas Carol as a children’s book, it can easily be understood by them. It is not a retelling of the birth of Jesus, but rather a story emphasizing that we are indeed our brother’s keeper and that mankind has a responsibility to see that no child grows up ignorant or wanting.
The Way of the Wolf by Martin Bell. While not specifically a holiday book, it does contain a story that is special to our family and one my husband shared year after year with our daughter, and one she continues to share with her children today. This is actually a collection of stories in which the wolf is a metaphor for God. The Tale of Barrington Bunny contained within this book is a parable of Jesus — the greatness of His love for us and how He died for us because of that love. Do yourself a favor, get this book; read about Barrington and share that tale with those you love.

I could go on and on with this list, but it’s a good start as it is. The emphasis is on “start.” Share the classics. Discover the sure-to-be classics. In sharing them with your little ones, you’ll be giving one of the most precious gifts you can. Reading is a magical gift we give to ourselves and share with others.

Share the magic of reading through children’s holiday books.

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What are some of your favorite holiday children’s books? Which ones have a special meaning or tradition in your family? Why not share those in the comments?

Best wishes for a very Merry Christmas and magical holiday season.

Share the Magic

By Renee Birchfield

The Christmas season is a magical time filled with joy, love, surprises and family. After Thanksgiving, there is magic in the air and the Christmas spirit is all around, it is one of my favorite times of the year.

One of my favorite things during the holidays is not the receiving of gifts but giving back to others. There are many people who don’t have the luxuries that so many of us do during the holidays. This is the time for giving and spreading the Christmas magic. I am blessed to be able to have enough extra to give back to others and to brighten their day.

There are many ways of sharing the magic these are some of my favorites that are pretty easy to do.

Angel tree- Pick an angle up from the Salvation Army Tree. They are set up at many stores and business places. We try and do this each year, it is so much fun to buy toys and clothes for kids who really need it. It is great to know that their Christmas will be a bit brighter now and that we were lucky enough to be a part of it.
Operation Christmas Child Shoeboxes- OCC has a wonderful program where you can pack a shoebox full of little toys and daily items. These boxes get sent to other countries and the children that receive them learn of Jesus by the volunteers who hand them out. I know of many families who do this for their children to learn the joy of giving to others.
Food Banks and Soup House- You can donate any time to a food bank but during the holiday season they can always use extra to serve the many people who need them. If you have extra time but not a lot of extra money you can volunteer and help serve food, organize their stock, or just talk to the people that come in.
Donate to a local shelter- Do you have old coats or winter clothing? Drop them off at a local homeless shelter. If you have extra time stay after you donate and interact with the people there, it will put a smile on their faces.
Donate to a Pet shelter- If you are a pet lover this may be perfect for you. Buy some extra toys, dog food or even beds to give to a shelter in your area. Dogs and cats enjoy some extra love too. I have a friend who does a bone drive and Christmas Eve she takes them to the local shelters.
Pay it forward- If you are going through the drive-thru, pay for the person’s meal behind you. I personally like to go to a coffee place and do this. Just thinking how nice it would be to buy someone’s warm drink on a cold winter day. You could even do this at the grocery store if you wanted.
Bake cookies or treats for your neighbors- Who doesn’t love cookies? Surprise your neighbors or coworkers with some fresh baked treats and I’m sure they will love you for it.

These are just a few ideas to help share the magic of the season with others. It doesn’t have to be an elaborate thing, all that’s needed is to take a bit of your time and give to those around you. I hope you and your family have a magical Christmas season!

What are some things you and your family do to share the magic of Christmas?

Renee shares her favorite things in life at Married and Hungry. Hoping that her newlywed situations and thoughts will help another new wife out there, and to let them know they are not alone. Being a self-proclaimed food nerd, with a degree in Food and Culinary Science, she shares her recipes and experiments. She and her husband call Central Arkansas home for now. You can find her at home making the kitchen a mess, trying to cross stitch, or playing with their dog and cat. Keep up with her over on Twitter, and Married and Hungry’s Facebook page.

The Magic of Christmas Lights

by Ricci Ellis

The days are getting shorter, the weather is getting cooler, and Thanksgiving is officially over. That can only mean one thing…Christmas is right around the corner!

The other night I was driving home from work and noticed some of my neighbors already had their Christmas lights up on their houses. I don’t know about you but there is nothing like the first sight of Christmas lights that really gets me in the holiday spirit! I saw lit up trees in windows, homes that looked like gingerbread houses come to life, and other homes that looked like they were dripping in icicles! I love Christmas lights!

Luckily for me Arkansas is home to many wonderful Christmas light displays all around the state. One of the most famous Christmas light displays that originated in Arkansas is the Osborne Family Lights. The Osborne Family Lights were started by Jennings and Mitzi Osborne and grew to a display of over three million lights. The lights are now at Disney World in Florida and have been there since 1995. The 2015 Christmas season will be the last year Disney will host the Osborne Family Lights.

If you don’t want to travel all the way to Florida to see some amazing Christmas lights have no fear because I have a list of Christmas light displays from around the state that will definitely get you in the Christmas spirit.

Christmas Lights

Here is a list of just a few of the many Christmas light displays from across the state…

1. Arkansas State Capital, Little Rock AR. The light display at the capital is set to be lit on December 5 after the Big Jingle Holiday Parade in downtown Little Rock. The lighting ceremony includes fireworks, music, and of course the lighting off the capital and the giant Christmas tree!

2. Holiday Lights at Garvan Woodland Gardens, Hot Springs AR. This display is set among the many gardens and contains over four million bulbs. There is special Santa lights and free holiday concerts held throughout the month of December.

3. Hot Springs Holiday Lights on Bathhouse Row, Hot Springs AR. I grew up in Hot Springs and I loved seeing al the trees lit in Hot Springs National Park and seeing the reindeer lit on top of the Arlington Hotel. The lighting at the Arlington in Hot Springs will take place December 4.

4. Lights of the Ozarks, Fayetteville AR. There will be over 400,000 lights decorating the Downtown Square in Fayetteville that will be lit every night from 5pm – 1am starting November 20. There are nightly carriage and pony rides, holiday music, and hot chocolate!

5. Lights at Harding, Searcy AR. November 30 kicked off their holiday season with the annual lighting ceremony of the Harding Lights at Harding University. The display has over 100,000 LED lights and will stay lit until the new year.

Harding Lights

6. Southern Arkansas University Celebration of Lights, Magnolia AR. SAU in Magnolia just celebrated the 32nd annual lighting of the campus on December 3. This year’s celebration is Polar Express themed and included a parade, Santa, music, and snacks. The lights will be on display throughout the Christmas season.

7. Christmas Wonderland, Crossett AR. This magical display of Christmas lights includes a drive through lighter tunnel, a large train, a light show, and bubble and snow machines among other things!

8. Candy Cane Lane, Pocahontas AR. This year is the 30th annual Candy Cane Lane celebration. Each year Maple Street is turned into a true Christmas wonderland complete with candy canes, Christmas lights, Santa and his elves!

This list is nowhere near complete as I am sure there are so many more amazing displays I have left out. However I hope I have listed something in your area that you can go see and get into the Christmas spirit!!

Ricci Ellis is an Arkansas native and current central Arkansas resident. Her favorite titles include dog mom, sister, aunt, blogger, respiratory therapist, and student. You can catch up with her on her lifestyle blog, Imperfectly Ricci, or on any social media @riccialexis.

Beautiful Abundance – The Gift of Friendship

My friendship post was all set. Listing how others have changed my life for the better was easy — and lovely.

Then it happened. Bennie Campbell died. She died.

Bennie Campbell

As a friend and neighbor she was really just a beautiful soul. No one loved to do for others like Bennie. She would call me and countless others and ask, “Is there anything I can do to help you today?”

How many friends say that to you on a daily basis? I’ll bet not many. How many do you ask if you can help daily?

Count each time someone has said something at just the right time, when needed most.

Just a few of my most abundant and amazing friendship gifts, WORDS.Words better than any gift one can receive.These are all very personal. I remember them, I remember the time and I remember where I was.

These words have assisted me in changing the trajectory of my life.

Doug Smith, Nashville, Tennessee: “Is there anything I can do for you that will make your life easier?”

Bill Gaither, Indianapolis and Nashville, when my Mother was going into heart surgery: “Do you need anything, anything at all?”

Virginia Newton, Copenhagen, upon my beating myself up one day: “You are perfect.” (Actually she’s the pretty perfect one!)

Carolyn Staley, Little Rock: “Laws don’t change people, hearts do.”

Debra Brawner, Nashville: “I sure miss you more than ever now.”

Ruth Brooks Langford

My Mother in Heaven, during the last month of her life: “I want to thank you for taking such good care of me.”

Ben Broyles, Conway: “Are you okay?” weeks after the death of my Mother, when he appeared at my front door to check on me.

Ruth Brooks Langford, Conway: “Are you okay? I love you.”

Jeremy Becker-Welts, Washington, DC: “Next time you need ANYTHING and you want to get hold of me quickly send me a text to XXX. I consider myself lucky to be able to help you.

Phyllis Hoffman DePiano, Birmingham, Alabama: “I love you. Know you are missing your Mom, you were a faithful daughter. You are precious.”

Scott Stewart, Denver: “Anything is possible.”

Cody Sublett, Conway: “Are you okay?”

Cody Sublett Family

Mikie McLendon, Magnolia, upon my arguing, crying for her NOT to do something: “How can I not help you with this?”

Of course she DID what she does. Thankfully!

And these people have shown loyalty is in their DNA at times when I needed it most:

David Phelps, Darren Irby, Stacey Scheirer, Ron Greene, Deborah Evans Price, Nancy May, Gary Price, Scott Stewart, Paris Broyles, Marjie McGraw, Angela Relder, Linda Thompson, Tracy Collins, Madeline Bell, Gary Robinson, Chris Reynolds, Kelly Van Patter, Marcia Minor, and on and on. I am a lucky girl.

Which leads me back to the night Bennie Campbell died. We could not find phone numbers for her daughters.

Here’s what happened: Paris Broyles called me; I called Patti Stobaugh; Patti tracked down a family member in Russellville who then reached her daughters.

Called Steve Norris, Minister at Robinson and Center where Bennie attended.

Bennie did not die alone — Patti and David Stobaugh; Paris and Ben Broyles; Steve Norris; Elizabeth and Mark Copeland with their daughter Kinsey; and me.

We waited for her daughters, Holly and Heather, surrounding them with love as Bennie had done for all of us so many times.

Bennie Campbell enjoyed an abundance of friends, she was loved by many. How lucky we were to have her friendship.

Will others say the same about us?

One day at a time, one friendship at a time. As Charlie Daniels says, “Let’s make the day count.”

Yes, Charlie, let’s.

Brenda McClain is Gallery Director for Art on the Green, the art vortex for Central Arkansas. She covers the lives of bloggers in her column for 501 Life magazine. Her blog, brendamcclain.com tells about her life and experiences in the Entertainment Business as the former CEO for MPR, a Nashville, Tn. based Public Relations agency.

You will usually find her reading the day’s headlines, drinking an espresso in Art on the Green.

Developing an Abundance Mentality

by Tiffany Hathorn

Developing an Abundance Mentality

We can’t control everything that happens to us in life. However, we can control the way that we perceive things and the way that we respond to them.

That is my mantra. With that in mind, I always try to be positive about things. Even in the midst of challenges and difficult situations. However, even with a focus on remaining positive, I have realized that I am prone to what has come to be known as a lack mentality.

For those of you who are not familiar with this concept, a lack mentality is essentially when we focus on those negatives in our life. By negative, I mean both the traditional sense of the word and feeling as though we have less than what we need of something (think of having a negative account balance).

When we are faced with challenges or decisions (even good decisions such as whether or not to take advantage of an opportunity to do something amazing), this lack mentality can rear its ugly head.

The thing is that the head can look different every time. Sometimes it is really subtle. It can even mask itself as a fact of life, making it that much more difficult to ignore or refute it.

Need examples? How many times have you said or thought one of the following statements:

This is an amazing opportunity, but I don’t have enough money.

It would be nice to do this, but I really don’t have the time.

I don’t feel confident enough in my skills to do that.

I don’t think I have the level of support that I would need to make that happen.

That sounds amazing, but people like me don’t really have the resources for that.

I was not afforded the same opportunities growing up as other people.

I’m not young enough to be able to pull that off. Maybe I could have 20 years ago.

If you are like most people, you could probably relate to at least one of those sentiments at some point in your life. Perhaps you are harboring one of those thoughts right now as you face a decision or challenge.

I know from experience how difficult it can be to even recognize that you have a lack mentality, let alone banish it. However, by making the mindset shift from one of lack to one of abundance, you can open yourself up to so much more opportunity, peace, and happiness. It won’t solve all of your problems (I don’t think there is anything that can), however, I am a firm believer that having a positive, abundance-oriented mindset can lead to changes in the way you perceive and respond to things. In turn, the way that you behave can have a tremendous impact on the direction that your life takes.

I can’t (and won’t) pretend that I am an expert on developing an abundance mentality, since it is something that is a work in progress for me (like much of life, right?). However, I did want to share some exercises that I have been implementing that have been helpful for me.

3 Steps to An Abundance Mentality

Abundance Mentality Exercise #1: Acknowledge the Positives #ARWB @arwomenbloggers

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This might seem really ‘hokey’ and simplistic, but I do think that there is some wisdom in looking at things from a positive point of view. Embracing the silver lining, if you will. For example, instead of focusing on the fact that you don’t have a great deal of money or that you don’t have enough money to do something you need or want to do, focus on the fact that you have your basic needs met or that you have the skills to bring in more income. Realize that, in most situations, things could always be worse than they actually are. By realizing that the worst-case scenario has not happened, it can help you to be able to focus more on the positives in your life.

Abundance Mentality Exercise #2: Focus on Solutions #ARWB @arwomenbloggers

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I like to think of myself as a positive realist. My first step is always to look at things from a positive and hopeful vantage point. However, I also believe in taking action. I see no point in worrying about things that you cannot change. Some things are simply outside of your control. Instead, you should spend your time focusing on those things that you can change. For example, if you feel like you don’t have enough time to do all of the things that you need to do, you could take time to assess exactly how you are spending your time. Once you know how you are spending your time, you can determine if there are some tasks or activities that you can reduce or eliminate to free up time for you to do the things you need to do. While you cannot create more time in the day, you CAN come up with ways to use the time you do have more efficiently.

Exercise #3: Positive Affirmations #ARWB @arwomenbloggers

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If you believe that energy (both positive and negative) actually impacts our lives in a tangible way, you could try adopting positive mantras and affirmations that you repeat to yourself throughout the day or when you feel yourself falling into a lack mentality. For example, if you have concerns about not having the skills you need to succeed at something, you can repeat to yourself something like “I am an intelligent, hard-working person who is highly capable of accomplishing anything that I set my mind to”. (Note: If you truly do need to brush up on your skills, refer to exercise #2). Many people believe that by putting positive thoughts/energy out into the universe, you attract positivity. However, even if you don’t believe that, I can’t think of a down side to uplifting and encouraging yourself. Self-love is a good thing!

Again, I am no expert on developing an abundance mentality, but I have found that through a combination of appreciating what I have, taking action, and thinking positively, I am better able to overcome the lack mentality when it makes an unwelcome appearance. If all else fails, you can always reach out to a friend or family member that can serve as a source of support, encouragement, and affirmation.

A Letter to my Younger Self

From: Paige Ray. Mom, Writer, and Podcaster. Age 31.5
To: Paige Burkham. Freshman college student. Age 18

Dear Paige –

I don’t have loads of time so I’m going to make this quick.

You will get married to a wonderful man and you will have a beautiful family. Right now, that’s basically all you think about. Ever.
And I just wanted to let you know that all that thinking, and wondering, and stressed out worrying isn’t going to do a single thing to speed up the process.

Repeat: It will not help.

But, since I know you’d rather be “doing” something than just un-patiently waiting for that day to come here are a few things you can do instead.

Write more.
Right now, you are pretty consistent about journaling but you need to stretch yourself. Take that class that everyone is scared of because there’s a creative writing project at the end – that challenge is good for you! Just because writing doesn’t come easy doesn’t mean it’s not worthwhile.

Read more.
Yes – I know you can make it through a paperback romance novel during a long weekend. And that’s fine. But, again, stretch yourself. Ask a teacher you admire what they last read. Or even, ask them what you wish they had read when they were your age. You won’t be disappointed.

Pick the experience over the object.

You were raised in a home where money was tight so you are always conscious of where you spend money. That’s great but that doesn’t always help when you have a choice of two things to spend money on. My advice is to go with the experience, the non-tangible thing that will allow you to make memories. Cars get old, clothes go out of style, but no one can take away the memory of you dancing in the rain in the middle of the Ouachita hills (yep- that’s on its way).

You may have noticed a common theme: stretching.

Getting out of your comfort zone.

Being willing to take a risk.

Yes, writing more means putting your thoughts out there for people to see and potentially judge. The payoff of self-expression is worth it.

Yes, reading different things means struggling over different and new concepts. The knowledge is worth it.

Yes, being the girl who chooses the experience over the “thing” means you might not have the latest and best, but you will have the most interesting conversations.

You have so much ahead of you. Take the risk and soak up the awesome that happens because of it.

Love,

Paige is a brand new mom who was scared that all of her creativity would be sucked dry after becoming a mother. Hear Motherhood is the project that came about because of that fear. Instagram is her favorite – visit her there because she’d love to hear your story.