By Dining With Debbie

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It may seems strange to you that someone retired should write about STARTing anything.  That’s certainly understandable, I suppose.  For many of you just starting your career as a teacher or musician or marketing guru or whatever it might be, the idea of retirement is as foreign as learning to read and write Sanskrit perhaps.  Maybe you’re newly married or newly a mom and the start of both still seem to be a grand adventure, with all of the complexity and confusion brought on by both and you can’t even begin to think past the beginning of either.

However,  you should.  Because it truly won’t be long before those fleeting moments are forty years in the past.  And what will you do then?  Will you be sad or mad that your beginnings now seem to be endings?  Will you look upon your life as a series of lost or misplaced opportunities or mistakes?  Will you mourn the loss of your youth and look upon age as a dreaded misfortune? Or will you START living your life today and do so in such a way that that negativity doesn’t happen?

In her column dated December 2, 1979 and reproduced in her book Eat Less Cottage Cheese, one of my favorite humorists, Erma Bombeck, penned these words of advice that might just help you avoid the failure to START living your life now.  I encourage you to print them up and put them in a place where you will read over them once a day, once a week or at least once a month.  You’ll be glad you did.

 “Someone asked me the other day if I had my life to live over would I change anything.  My answer was no, but then I thought about it and changed my mind.

If I had my life to live over again I would have waxed less and listened more.
Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy and complaining about the shadow over my feet, I’d have cherished every minute of it and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was to be my only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.
I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded.
I would have eaten popcorn in the “good” living room and worried less about the dirt when you lit the fireplace.
I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.
I would have burnt the pink candle that was sculptured like a rose before it melted while being stored.
I would have sat cross-legged on the lawn with my children and never worried about grass stains.
I would have cried and laughed less while watching television … and more while watching real life.
I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband which I took for granted.
I would have eaten less cottage cheese and more ice cream.
I would have gone to bed when I was sick, instead of pretending the Earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren’t there for a day.
I would never have bought ANYTHING just because it was practical/wouldn’t show soil/ guaranteed to last a lifetime.
When my child kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, “Later. Now, go get washed up for dinner.”
There would have been more I love yous … more I’m sorrys … more I’m listenings … but mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute of it … look at it and really see it … try it on … live it … exhaust it … and never give that minute back until there was nothing left of it.”
Eat Less Cottage Cheese and More Ice Cream: Thoughts on Life From Erma Bombeck.

I don’t believe that there is failure in not finishing.  Instead, I believe that the real failure is in the not STARTing.  For how can you accomplish anything if you fail to START?  And there are still lots of STARTs waiting on me in retirement because each and every day is a new opportunity to begin living life now,  and I plan to seize every one of them.

And that, my friends, is a very good thing.

 

  Debbie is a co-administrator of Arkansas Women Bloggers and blogs at Dining With Debbie.  A native Arkansan, she spends much of her time traveling between the central area where she lives and the northwest area of the state where she plays with her perfect grandchildren  .  She hangs out with her Hubby of 44 years in both places.

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